Posts Tagged ‘talking to strangers’

Atlas Air Conditioning

Saturday, July 24th, 2010

I went to Home Depot today, as I too often do. Aimlessly wandering the aisles looking for nothing more in particular than what I came for (as I too often do), my brainstormings were interrupted by a sweet, short older lady. She, keeping a polite distance from this total stranger, asked with checked excitement “Where did you get that shirt?” The shirt in question is a deep yellow t-shirt with the word “ATLAS” in three-inch bold letters across the chest, and “Air Conditioning” in smaller italics underneath. I bought this gem at a Goodwill in San Marcos before a river trip three years ago. These trips are reckless good fun, and having lost many things of value on them over the years, I had opted to get some sweet tubing duds on the cheap. Had I worn anything that cost more than the two dollars I spent on this mango marvel, I certainly would have lost it. But the river didn’t want this shirt, so I still have it. And for whatever reason, I wear it more often than a lot of other shirts.

And so I was wearing it again today. At the end of the aisle there in Home Depot, I told this pleasant stranger I had bought the shirt in San Marcos. I didn’t tell her why; she clearly seemed to see more in it then my river revelry would do justice to. She said her dad had worked for Atlas Air Conditioning many years ago. She described their vans that were the same color as my shirt. The more she said, the more she smiled in a far-away kind of way, and the closer she leaned, looking wistfully at the ATLAS across my chest. She made it close enough to reach out and touch my arm, gently, like a caring old friend. And she said in a fond sort of remembrance “I doubt they’re still around anymore… but this is neat.” She was talking to a complete stranger, but in her glowing expression, her sweet smile, and gentle touch that lingered for a few extra moments on my arm, I couldn’t help but feel like she was seeing something much, much more familiar.

Sound(less) advice

Monday, May 10th, 2010

Friday morning my wife and I were in a hospital elevator on our way from the Big Appointment. Our doctor just told us what we are having… kind of, but not really. Anyway, the appointment is another story. The point is, we were excited. And joining us in the elevator was an equally excited young couple and their infant son. The father looked a little awkward holding the baby. He had his forearms extended with the boy laid on its back facing him. He cradled the baby’s head in his hands, and the baby had its legs curled in the crook of the father’s arms. The baby looked content enough while dad looked a little nervous, slightly uncomfortable, and maybe dazed. I asked him if he had any advice. He seemed surprised at the question, and a little embarrassed as he fumbled for something useful to say. His wife and Candice started talking cheerfully about sleep or something.

And then Dad stopped looking so awkward. He hadn’t really changed anything. He had just looked back down at the son in his arms and stared. They stared at each other. He was still trying to come up with an answer. He had this kind-of aww-shucks, I-don’t-know kind of way about him. He really wanted to say something helpful, and Lord knows he was trying, but all he could do was stare, face-to-face with the son in his arms and he would smile reservedly, certainly proud, but awfully uncertain. His wife prodded him, suggesting topics like diapers and sleep. He still wasn’t sure what to say. We did talk about his shift work (yeah, I said “shift work”) and how he was doing his best to be around as much as he could. The wives were still talking about sleep, I think. About how it felt to be a dad, he said stuff like “it’s awesome” and “it’s great”. He never really came up with that advice, as hard as he tried, even as we walked out of the hospital into the parking lot. I hope he didn’t feel too bad about that.

In the elevator, as he had stared down at his boy that he held so distinctively, he was looking for answers to his own questions. He had had a look like asking “What do I tell him? Should I tell him anything? Do I know what I’m doing? Am I a good Dad, son?”. I learned a whole heck of a lot about being a dad back in that elevator.